It started young with bedtime tales

Of years that had gone by

Gramps told of how they use to live

And how they all had died.

It made me wonder who they were

And what they all had been

So the hunt began for names and dates

To look up all my kin.

I knew there were some famous ones

Like Daniel Boone and Dewey

But had no idea that I would find

That most of them were screwy!

Like old maid Flo who had a fear

Of men and all their groping

She wore a whistle round her neck

(... but I think she was just hoping!)

And then I found an Uncle George

Whose stories send you reeling

He was caught with someone's horse

So they strung him up for stealing.

Next I found old scarlet Lucy

Who ran a house of sin

Till they closed it down and locked her up

For her wicked way with men.

After hearing bout Grandpa Henry

I put my hunt to rest

Could take no more afraid I’d find

That my bloodline's not the best.

So be prepared when you start your hunt

For those ghost that once lay hidden

Could raise and haunt you in the night

And you might regret the diggin!